Looking for belonging in my Black, disabled body

This essay investigates my lived experience as a Black woman, frequently mischaracterised as aggressive and threatening, alongside my journey with epilepsy. By weaving together personal accounts of racism and ableism, I employ Porges’ polyvagal theory to illuminate the profound effects of systemic discrimination on the ANS. Furthermore, exploring neuroception reveals how systemic oppression disrupts essential human connections, highlighting a critical area of concern.I also engage with Fanon’s theory of decolonising the mind and Menakem’s concept of the ‘soul nerve’, emphasising the pivotal role of narrative transformation in achieving genuine self-regulation. In examining clinical studies, I reveal how therapists can successfully support clients with intersectional identities by embodying a ‘ventral presence of healing’, fostering emotional regulation in these individuals.Nonetheless, it is crucial to acknowledge the limitations of current theories on affect regulation, which often place the onus on unregulated individuals. This perspective falls short of addressing the unique experiences of those with disabilities, especially neurological conditions. Western psychotherapy tends to disregard the importance of intuition and its impact on neuroception, as well as the legacies of colonisation and self-othering. This essay calls for a more inclusive and compassionate approach to psychotherapy that genuinely understands and addresses these complexities.