‘ They just don’t know what we’ve been through ’ : migrant reflections on stigma and compromised fertility in Aotearoa New Zealand

Compromised fertility is not just a medical issue; it is also a deeply social and emotional one. For many Asian women who move to Aotearoa New Zealand, the stigma surrounding childlessness does not disappear when they cross borders. Instead, it follows them through their continuing connections with diasporic communities. This article explores how women navigate stigma while trying to build lives in a new cultural setting. Our findings show that silence and social withdrawal often become protective strategies in the face of stigma. By keeping their struggles private or distancing themselves from their communities, women create space to preserve dignity and self-worth. Having grown up in societies that place immense value on motherhood, many internalise the belief that being childless diminishes their identity as women. Using transnationalism and migration frameworks, we demonstrate that stigma is not left behind at the border but travels and transforms across diasporic networks. We also found that persistent and intrusive questions about childbearing, such as ‘When are you having children?’ or ‘Why don’t you have any yet?’, operate as subtle but powerful tools of social scrutiny and stigmatization. By situating infertility within transnational identity negotiations, this article highlights tensions between diasporic cultural preservation, gendered expectations, and reproductive justice in shaping the lived experiences of migrant women and couples trying to create families.