Through Their Eyes: “My Mother Hit Me Because I’m a Girl…” The Looking-Glass Self and Parents’ Perception of Childhood Maltreatment

Self-perception shapes how individuals view themselves and interact with the world. For parents with a history of childhood maltreatment, these self-perceptions are often influenced by past trauma and negative relational experiences. However, there is still very little research done on how the looking-glass self is processed in parents with maltreatment experience as a child; and how they perceive the experience. This study explores how parents who experienced maltreatment during childhood perceive and interpret their experiences. The study is analyzed through the lens of Symbolic Interactionism, with a particular focus on the Looking-Glass Self perspective. Using a qualitative case study approach, in-depth interviews were conducted with seven parents (five mothers and two fathers), aged 32–50 years old, from a variety of sociodemographic backgrounds, including high socioeconomic urban, low socioeconomic urban, and low socioeconomic rural. Content and thematic analysis was assisted by Nvivo version 12.6.0. All parents are aware of the maltreatment experienced in childhood. Despite the maltreatment experience that happened decades ago, all parents mentioned that those experiences affected the way they see themselves up until now. However, they had difficulty changing this mindset. These results point out the catastrophe of experiencing maltreatment during childhood: it can affect a person in the long term, even until they grow and enter the stage of parenthood. The finding also highlights the need for help for parents with maltreatment experiences as a child to improve their self-representation.