Accepting vs. Trying to Change Close Others' Emotions (DECO)

How are strategies of trying to change a close other’s emotions and accepting their emotions associated with outcomes for the close other? ‘Change’ strategies are those used to modify others’ experienced emotions (i.e., reappraisal, distraction), expressed emotions (i.e., suppression), or attitudes towards emotions (i.e., meta-acceptance or encouraging someone to accept their emotions). These strategies are conceptually distinct from the strategy of simple acceptance, which is simply accepting an emotional experience, expression, or attitudes towards emotions without trying to change them. In four prior studies that employed different study designs (e.g., longitudinal, round-robin), stressful contexts (e.g., COVID pandemic, transition to parenthood), and different relationship types (e.g., romantic partners, parent-child, friendship), we found consistent evidence that all ‘change’ strategies, including reappraisal, distraction, suppression, and meta-acceptance, were not consistently associated with close others’ mental health outcomes. By contrast, simple acceptance of a close other’s emotions was associated with better mental health of the close other (e.g., higher life satisfaction and meaning in life, as well as lower depression and anxiety). Given that the two types of acceptance – meta-acceptance (i.e., a ‘change’ strategy) and simple acceptance – were examined in separate studies, it is possible the different patterns associated with these two strategies were driven by differences in study designs and sample characteristics. The current study allows us to examine simple acceptance and meta-acceptance in the same dataset and to further explore the inconsistent effects of “change” strategies.