Materializing care in exile

There is a Meto saying that sticks with me: “ Au uneop ho ” or “I think of you”. It was a phrase I often heard during research in Timor-Leste 1 when a person expressed concern about the well-being of someone or something. These words commonly followed long separations. My host, a Meto-speaking East Timorese grandmother who worked as a swidden farmer, would hold my hands in hers, gazing warmly at me and saying she had thought of me while I was away between research visits. At first, I captured a sense of pity in the way people spoke these words, which puzzled me. For instance, throughout fieldwork stays in the Oecussi highlands, people frequently commented that I was there alone even though I was staying with a host family. They pointed out that I had no husband to keep me company. “ Aiiyh, kasihan! (poor you!)” people would exclaim in disbelief, shaking their heads, looking at each other with shared concern on their faces before closing with the sentiment, “ Aiiyh… Au uneop ho ”. The thought that I was far away from home, in a foreign country, was something that made them feel sorry for me or, at least, think of me.