Chasing Crows

Chasing Crows ByVoight KampffThis road had been longer than the memory could recall, he hated it.It had morphed from motorway to road, to track and now to narrow path. It dissolved into nothing but a lonesome tree, this was no oasis nor the foot of a castle but a meaningless nothing, not even the rotting corpse of the last sorry wretch that must have trod the last of this path, an empty desert, this was the end of things, freedom is not so pretty a word for those who make it this far."A million and one places you could have stopped, what twist of madness drove you to leave your bones here?" Kappa swung his axe without the force to split this last log and decided not to bother his arse pulling it out for another swing "fuck it", he collected up as much wood as he could wrap his arms around and went inside.This was the edge of the world where forests and mountains don't have names, Kappa hadn't assigned them with names, they were memories."Smelly, damp, up to your neck in brambles wood" or "Fuck that, I’m not going up there again mountain".Kappa hadn't seen a single soul in these parts and had decided long ago, that might be for the best.Out of ear shot and further than the eye can see, this was his kingdom, a small roughly made home in a small untidy clearing surrounded by quiet.Kappa, who on any other occasion might be strutting around naked, singing badly, throwing stones into the stream, was in a sombre mood.Kappa’s cheek had swollen, Kappa had had tooth ache for four days now and there was no sign of his immune system gaining a foothold on the rot.This was a great cause for concern, Kappa feared the descent into desperation and what that might mean, how far a thing will go to escape pain.Kappa had turned his home over trying to find an answer. It dawned on him long before peering into an old boot for the third time that this was no hunt for a pain relief, there wasn’t any, this was a failing exercise in distraction. “Fuck fuck fuck fuck” in time with the throbbing in his face.The clove would have kicked in by now if it was going too, a moan of desperation made it to his vocal chords as he knelt down in the middle of the floor and began to rock back and forth in a failing attempt to sooth away the noise in his head “What the fuck am I meant to do now?”“If you’re really out there, NOW is you BIG fucking chance, I am asking for your help, if you really exist, now would be an excellent time to help me the fuck out!”Kappa pauses for a deliberate and belligerently short couple of seconds “Didn’t think so you lousy fucker”.Kappa sprang to his feet, marched over to the sink, dragged his tool box from underneath and rummaged through it with a clatter.Kappa pulled out a hammer, looked at it and with a half chuckle half cry, dispensed with the idea of attempting to knock the offending tooth out with it, tossed it aside and clattered through his tool box some more, pulled out his pliers, old rusty and reluctant to open even with some force, held them up in the air and inspected them “shit!”.“I've been here before, you cant grip a tooth with pliers, the angles are all wrong and teeth, way too slippery”.Despite this, Kappa reached into his mouth with the pliers, gripped the tooth as best he could and gently moved them to see if the grip was good “aarrrr” in anticipation. The pain was no worse, the tooth moved with the pliers, the grip seemed good “aaaaaarrrrr” again in anticipation as he contemplated his next move, pulling was no good the pliers would slip off, the only other possible move was to twist it out in one aggressive move. “Aaaaaarrrrrrrrrrr”... The pliers snapped shut as they slipped off the tooth, the pain soared to new heights. Kappa slammed to the floor, curled up in a ball and began banging his forehead against his knees whilst singing a song with no distinguishable words, waiting for the pandemonium inside his head to ease.“This is fucked!..The nearest help is further than I can walk in a week”.Kappa jumped to his feet grabbed the torch from behind the door, lit it on the fire and stepped outside. Outside was dark and still with stars sprayed across the sky.It was cold enough to see the breath. On any other night Kappa might have pulled out his chair, lit a smoke and pondered the magnitude of existence but tonight Kappa strode off into the forest at a determined pace. Ten minutes later Kappa arrived into a small damp clearing, knelt down and began to scan the earth around him. His torch, still burning well, lit an orange dome of shadows, leaves and branches that leaned in and danced with the flame.Kappa was no big fan of the dark especially this far from his warm fire but the way he felt right now he'd Kick a rabid dog in the bollocks just to take him away from the here and now.“Ah there you are”, Kappa leaned in towards the ground and brought his torch forward, tucked under a tree root was a small grey blue mushroom.Kappa drew a deep breath, carefully reached out and plucked the mushroom from its hiding place, held it up to the light and inspected it.After another deep breath he carefully reached into his mouth and placed it between his cheek and his gum where the most pain was emanating.Kappa was momentarily statuesque in his orange dome waiting for the urgency of his mission to ebb and his here and now to catch up. After a short pause Kappa begins to inspect his surroundings, the light of his torch does not reach far into the dark, not far enough to see any incoming claws or teeth.“Don't wind yourself up Kappa” he mutters to himself as he looks behind, then to the left, then right, then left, and then behind again. “Stay calm,” he whispers. Kappa knew there were no such things as monsters but he only knew this when the sun was up, now it was dark and he wasn't so sure. “Everything is fine,” he says a little louder in an attempt to convince himself that his voice won't wake anything with more teeth than brain cells.A piece of burning material that flakes from his torch and drops to the floor catches his attention, he looks at it and then at the torch.“Shit! That's not going to last ten minutes”, Kappa bolts into a march, resisting the urge to run but at this pace the torch starts to roar as it cuts through the air, Kappa feels that its making too much noise and he wont hear any teeth stalking him. “Shit!” he picks up the pace, the roar gets louder and he tries to look in all directions at once... THUNK! His foot snagged a root, like a noose and as strong as rope, it shows his foot no mercy. He lunges forward, his boots slapping the ground desperately trying to catch up with his head but it was too late. Kappa has to throw his arms forward to break his fall. Straight into a bramble, sparks flying every which way.Kappa jumped up in a flash ripping himself from the thorn's grip.Holding what was left of his the torch high above his head he begins to slowly rotate so he can scan in all directions. There’s no tooth ache here and he can't feel the blood running down from his elbow or the peppering from the brambles but he can hear his lungs heaving. His breathing is making too much noise he can't hear past it. He tries to hold his breath but it only makes him all the more desperate to heave great lungs of noisy air. Suddenly there's a sound in the brambles right next to him. Something moved. This triggers every muscle in his body to attempt a leap from this world into a better one, Kappa is now at full tilt, leaping fallen trees with barely a touch and dodging the whirlwind of obstacles that his pace is throwing at him.Kappa curses himself as his logic catches up. “It was the brambles springing back into position, idiot!” but it was too late he was unable to calm. His instincts and imagination had taken over and his logic was along for the ride. The oil on the hessian is all but used up and the torch is now leaving a trail of tiny fires as the hessian breaks up, each piece taking some of the all important light with it, “Fuck fuck fuck!” Kappa, who is no longer looking back allows his imagination to insert claws and teeth reaching out for his calves... Of course there wasn't but Kappa’s imagination was running as fast as he was and was going to run his feet to stumps until it knew for sure.“Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it!” The last of the torch flickers out. Kappa is nearing his home and knows the area like the back of his hand. He drops the dead torch and starts to use both hands to help propel him forward past the last of the trees. At last, he can see the glow of his fire through the shutters. He races across the clearing and slams through his door, digs his heels in on the other side and slams his weight back against the closing door. “Fuck it! Every fucking time!”.Kappa leans against the door heaving in and out, his brain trying to make sense of the gap between his logic and his response, his body still pinning the door shut.“The fucking brambles I landed in were just springing back after you crushed them, you fucking dumb-ass!”.Kappa starts to catch his breath and relax a little but still pauses for a moment before he lets go of the door. Now he feels the pain, the mushroom tastes earthy but the tooth ache is bearable.Kappa’s arms sting, he stands in the light of his fire and begins the task of removing thorns.Kappa chuckles at himself, "You dozy shite, I don’t believe you did that shit.”He continues to hunt for thorns on his body where he knows he has already removed them. “Fucking thorns, they feel just the same when you take them out.” The blood that had run from his elbow to his wrist had dried and was not helping.Kappa threw a couple of logs on the fire, rolled a smoke and slumped into his chair to absorb the warm orange glow, tonight the fire was extra warm and the glow extra orange. “Splendid.” Kappa drifted back into the tranquillity of meandering thought, the fire spat occasionally and had settled to a dull glow. Kappa closed his eyes and wondered what it might be like to swim in the cool