Unmothered: A Phenomenological Study of Black Daughters Who Are Detached From Their Black Mothers

Mother-daughter relationships are often characterized as foundational, nurturing bonds, but for some adult daughters, the relationship is a source of pain and disconnection. This phenomenological study explored the lived experiences of adult Black American daughters who are detached from their Black American mothers, influenced by Bowen Family Systems Theory’s emotional cutoff concept. Seventeen Black adult women, aged 27-49, were interviewed to assess how they made meaning of being detached from their mothers, along with the ways it shaped their lives. Findings showed that detachment was a gradual response to a history of harmful mothering. Daughters described detachment as an act of self-preservation that offered peace and emotional stability. Withdrawing from mothers was often fixated within the context of personal meaning, cultural norms, and socializing practices, providing nuanced insights on experiences of women who represent different aspects of the Black American community. Although detachment was articulated as a necessary act, it uncovered a lingering mother wound as several daughters continued to mourn the fractured relationship. In response to maternal detachment, daughters pursued healing and showed commitment to breaking generational cycles within their families and the Black community at large. By illuminating the theoretical, cultural, emotional, and spiritual dimensions of maternal detachment, this work contributed to discourse on Black family life and offers practical implications for future research, psychological practice, and faith-based settings.